Mother's Week Continued.....

Darren's mother, Marilyn.......
I knew when I got married, I had to have a good relationship with my in-law parents. I had heard and seen enough of the contrary that I knew I wanted something different for myself. Now that I have been part of the Lotz family for nearly a decade now, there are some things I have come to love about his mother.

**Mom has a contagious laugh. She laughs easily and when you really get her good or something is really funny and catches her off guard, her laugh makes me start to laugh. It's the sound of delight. Often, if she's laughing at me, it's followed by an "oh, Ferf!"

**Mom thinks through anything before she says it. And actually, their whole family is like this. They don't answer reactionary or flippant. They think about how they really feel or what they really think, and then answer. Through the years it has taught me to become better in touch with my honest thoughts and feelings in the moment.

**We are related.....by blood. While I was dating Darren, Mom commented to me that she had a grandmother with the same last name as my father. After a little research we found the common link. It was a little odd to realize that I was now related to this family whether I married Darren or not, but it also was very fun. With all the people in the world, we found each other. That's pretty cool in my book.

**When I was first married to Darren and mom and I would have a difference of opinion, or something one of us did that did NOT work for the other, talking about it didn't go well oft times. I think I wasn't sure how to say it, and mom didn't want to hear it.....but both of us wanted to work through it so it wouldn't be an issue between us. There are still things we don't totally agree on, but we still love each other and want to be respectful. I have watched Mom go from quite afraid of talking about problems to quite open. It is a compliment to me that she loves me enough to be willing to look at issues that might be hard to do. I'm not the easiest person to talk to sometimes and so I really appreciate her willingness.

**Mom calls me....a lot. Most daughters in law and mother in laws don't talk as often as we do. And we talk less than we used to. I appreciate that when I am feeling a little invisible or "left out" as we live away from both of our families, I know I will get a call from mom sometime. She seems to know when it's been too long since we touched in and manages to know that I might be feeling lonely.

**There have been many times she has offered to help us. Many times she has been a huge support after surgery or illness. Many times she has come to visit when I needed some company. Many times she has returned my frustrations with love. I love you Mom.....and I am grateful for ALL the ways we are related, and all the things that have drawn us closer.